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Discussing surrogacy with your children

by Fertility & Surrogacy Legal Group, APC | May 11, 2023 | Surrogacy Law

While surrogacy can be a wonderful option for those struggling with infertility or other medical conditions, it can be a difficult topic to discuss with children. Whether you’re a California parent who has used a surrogate or are considering surrogacy as an option, talking to your children about the process can help them understand and accept it better.

Start the conversation early

It is important to start the conversation about surrogacy early, even if your children are very young. By introducing the topic early on, you can establish an open and honest dialogue with your children. This can also help them feel comfortable asking questions about surrogacy later on.

Keep the conversation age-appropriate

When talking to your children about fertility assistance, it is important to use language that is familiar to them. Young children may not need to know all the details of the surrogacy process, while older children may be able to handle more information.

Explain the reasons for your decision

When talking about surrogacy, explain the reasons why it may be necessary. This can include infertility, medical conditions, or other reasons why a person or couple may need a surrogate to carry a pregnancy to term. Help your children understand that surrogacy is a way for families to grow.

Emphasize the importance of family

One way to help your children understand surrogacy is to emphasize the importance of family. Explain that a surrogate is helping to create a family and that everyone involved is excited about the new addition.

Be open and honest

Answer your children’s questions as truthfully as possible, and be prepared for some difficult questions as kids possess inquisitive minds. Remember that it is okay to say that you don’t know the answer to a question and that you will find out.

Reassure your children that they are loved

It’s essential to reassure your children that they are loved and that the surrogacy process does not change that. Help them understand that their family is growing and that this is a positive thing.